So what if we aren't on two unknown, unheralded armchair demographic researchers' wish list!
By Henri D. Kahn
City Manager Larry Dovalina and Mayor Betty Flores should be grinning from ear to ear about Sperling and Sander's demographic regurgitations instead of yelling "Foul!"
So rather than cry in our beer, let's check out some of the Sperling and Sander (aka SOS) demographic regurgitations and review their criteria for a good place to hang your hat.
Los Angeles , California sits comfortably in the top 25 percent of the SOS desirable cities in which to live.
I must concede that LA does offer a lot of great entertainment and cultural stimulation. However. . . .
Ever been in a commercial aircraft as a passenger approaching the LA airport? I have, and the smog was so thick the ground was not visible until the altimeter was hovering at 60 feet . When I deplaned, my nostrils winced at the smell of auto exhaust fumes.
Have you ever driven on a congested LA freeway? I have. The experience is a nightmare of reckless driving at law- and neck-breaking speeds that daily terrify even the local residents.
Know anyone that has purchased a home in the Los Angeles area? I do. It's nothing to buy a 1,200 sq. ft . bungalow for $200,000.
Ever heard of the Crips or the Batos? They hang out in LA, one of the capitals of violent crime in this country.
LA residents experience repeated earthquakes, severe air and water pollution, overcrowded schools, and frequent budget shortfalls. The climate isn't exactly aces, either. The temperature swings from hot to hotter to muggy with air conditioning relief coming at a very high price.
Oh, and if you decide to open a business, prepare to pay the highest insurance rates in the USA .
Packing your bags anytime soon?
Santa Fe , New Mexico , a number two SOS pick, is 62 miles from the closest commercial airport, but that doesn't seem to bother the enormous number of wealthy Californians who arrive in their plush Gulfstreams to enjoy a little bacchanalian R&R in their own desert sand-colored adobe palaces.
This sophisticated piece of the poor State of New Mexico caters mostly to high rollers, and tolerates the common tourist for two or three days at a time. Native Americans represent a mere 2.1 percent of a Sante Fe that sits smack dab in the middle of Injun country. Must be that the wealthy whites ostracized the majority of local Native Americans for each of them to enjoy .00000001 percent of their gambling casino profits.
Moving to this mecca of southwestern tourism means you better take your nest egg with you and hone your skills as a waiter/waitress, hotel clerk, or fake Navajo so you can sell jade and silver earrings, bracelets, or gaudy belt buckles.
Finally, if you really want to fit in, hop in your Masserati and hook 'em for a very hot, arid, expensive place that is a mere 38 miles from the US government's atomic research facility at Los Alamos . You know, nuclear fusion tests, home of the Manhattan Project, etc.
After doing my own research, at our wonderful local library, on cities rated by Sperling and Sander, I discovered that they also went to their local library.
These enterprising fellows seem to have worked their way into profitable plagiarism. The statistics I found are incredibly identical to the SOS book Cities Ranked and Rated.
My critique of this publication is that its authors, SOS, are the literal translation of that breakfast food the Marine Corps kept trying to feed me in boot camp.
Who knows, this book could very well attract curious tourists who want to know how people live in a place without rich cultural stimulation, nauseating air pollution, congested highways, or the threat of earthquakes.
Remember, we're just eight months away from sending Bush to cut brush, permanently, in Crawford.
